mintak maaf =(

Mintak maaf...saya x tau apa kena dengan saya...dlm 2,3 ari saya asyik nak cari gaduh dengan org....mangsa2 adalah 0rg terdekat...huhu...ketidak stabilan h0rmon saya kali ini mmg sangat pelik...paling kesian naim...asyik kena marah dengan saya...huhu....mintak maaf =(

Mak saya...saya p0n mintak maaf jugak....dlm 2,3 ari ni saya mrajuk x mau pergi keja....saya jadi x de m0od pergi salun....pergi salun p0n sbb kesian mak...hmm...saya tau saya anak yg teruk....mintak maaf jugak...

the puzzles in mind

Life d0es not running the same when u choose the wr0ng path. Running a business w0n't be the same when u received monthly salary and.. keeping it runs well is another issue that need to be noted.

I've choosed this..thou, i haven't place the fullst0p on it. I rather be something else than this..something that i wish to be since i was a child. well, dreams..wishes...and ambitions..clearly, this wasn't part of it. Its not that i regret it..well..slig

htly, but day by day...kind enjoying it...i likes 2 see people smiling after their hair was d0ne..the looks of satisfying their hopes...their wishes...i feels like angel sometimes...heee..=)

Yeah, the puzzles..when will i ever going to solve it...is there any job out there that fits me well?..fits my child dreams...reporting absolutely something that need to be noted on...but having it as career...need to reconsider...n0pe..

people says, i'm lucky..am i? still young and have business to run on..0wh, no i'm n0t if that they wish to kn0w...like i've said..running a business wasn't the same when living on m0nthly salary..i rather be in their shoes... what all u've seen..is n0t always what u think...yes, its true...ckp senang la..buat teng0k...

blaaa...blaa...blaa...keep whining and whining everyday h0w the business took my entire life...everyday, just thinking h0w's t0 make it run well...everynight keeps thinking and dreaming h0w's i could gain m0re pr0fit...h0w i could sustains the business inc0me...0wh..dem..and feels like i wish if i could just sell it and finds s0mething else 2 d0...i also have my 0wn needs...priorities....if...this decision i havent made...my life...maybe different..better..or worst?? that puzzles...i let it be unsolved...what to decide are decisions..2day...and soon...i h0pe my life would be better because of what i did 2day....=))

Rindu

Dahulu, sekarang..perkara yang berbeza..sebagaimana dunia semakin berubah...aku juga turut berubah. Kalau dahulu aku rasa seperti malas dan menyampah untuk menjejak kaki ke bandar bernama KL...tapi semakin lama aku dsini, seperti aku semakin merindui duniaku dsana. H0hoho...yea..manusia berubah...aku cemburu melihat rakan2 bekerja sebgai rep0rter...aku semakin rindu dunia itu...

pencetus semngat

Esk puasa..yeay esk puasa...but i x...well..its a n0rm..n0t pr0ud of it...s0metimes...rasanya berd0sa bila fikir, kang bgus klu aku ni lelaki...my dad would never easily c0ntr0lling me like i am a child eventhough i am 25!!...rasa mcm dipndg rendah, dan dpandang useless sgt. My choice 2 stay at h0me just 2 be my m0m side, bkn sbb x nak berdikari. Aku nak sgt...cari pengalamn sndiri..cemburu dgn kwn2 yang dpat ter0ka pengalamn baru dtempat yang mereka x penah pergi.

Aku x penah minat utk jadi hairstylist jujurnya...x penah trpikir...tapi klu sekali dah menyeluk pekasam biarlah smp ke pangkal lengan ye x? yes...i am learning..dan pr0ses 2 x kan berhenti...smp bila...bidang baru ni bnyk cabarannya..bisnes bkn mcm keja mkn gaji ngan 0rg..tiap2 blan leh senang hati dpat gaji...ini, tiap2 bulan bkn senang hati...ssh hati nak bayar gaji pkrja..bayar sewa kdai..byar bil2...t0p up st0ck kdai...kita yg jadi b0ss p0n hnya pada nama..duit dlm p0ket lagi ciput dr pkerja...tetapi inilah namanya dugaan yang harus kita terima dan redha..

.....chaiy0k2....cheer untk diri sendiri...i can d0 it...=)

kes..kes....

kadang2...kepala ni ssh nak pr0ses maklumat. Aduhh...penat pikir nie...duit...duit...mana nak cr duit nie...nak pinjam, nnt mampu ke nak bayar balik...ptptn p0n pr0b...aishhh...g blajar facial...kes..kes..(pinjam trademark amin)....aku xbrape nak suka...urmm...nak je aku bg cdngan kat mak..jual jelah kdai nie...aku g cr keja...k0mpem2 jd exec...takat 1800 2...k0mpem dpt tiap2 bln...tapi bila mata aku ni menjelajah keliling kdai...aduhhh...sayangg....=(

Apa x nyer..mcm2 da buat kat kdai nie...brg2 semua...dr cam hampeh...dah cantik jelita dah..tapi mcm agak tersmbunyi skit... signb0ard kat luar 2...0rg x tau pe la menda ikhtiyar 2...perkataan salun and spa 2..x brape nak nampk..lagi 1...tangga 2....aku yg muda p0n x suka naik...apa lagi la 0rg tua...kes..kes...apa lagi yg nak dbuat utk naik kan bisnes kdai ni ek..

nak g pr0mosi ke sekolah...agak laa..aku s0rg jer...jenuh laa..klu try wat akademi kdai nie..leh la jgk amik praktikal student...jimat k0s...masalahnya...i l0m layak u...huhu...jenuh aku try pr0ses cr idea...x jumpa lagi jalan nie...flyers dah wat dah...harga mmg dah murah habes...x leh murah dah...ssh aku nnt...

t0pik panas utk anak dara~

Kawin..kawin...dan kawin...itu je ke yg 0rg pndang bila tgk muka aku...ada tulis ek kat dahi aku yg aku ni dah wajib kawin...ok fine..i am a girl..and i am 25..s0 what?? s0me questi0n came t0 me s0unds like this.."bila nak kenduri?" " umur brape? dah kawen bl0m?" and s0me statement sounded like this " awk ni cepatla kawen nnt jadi anak dara tua" klu x p0n..."dah sesuai 2 kawen..jgn tunggu lama2"...

Aduii..di0rg ingt pe, kawen ni keja sehari je ke? x tau ke nak kena ngadap lelaki yg kita kawen 2 seumur hidup..itu p0n klu smpai seumur hidup laa..ntah2 kawen 2 bulan cerai..pe kes?? nak kutuk aku x de rupa x de 0rg nak ke?? ehh...s0ri skitm bukan aku msuk bakul angkat sendiri...tapi mmg sah2 aku ada rupa..bkn x de 0rg nak..tp rmai sgt yg nak memain ngan aku...x p0n p0n cal0n yg ada...x mau serius...ha, sama la maksud 2 kan...x de 0rg nak...ok ..fine..x de 0rg nak...sbb 2 bapak aku ssh payah calon anak kwn dia yg itu...yg ini...smpai aku naik rimas...tapi adakah dia sedar..anak dara dia yg sul0ng p0n bl0m lagi bercal0n dan bersuami..apa nak dikisahkan anak dara nye yg masih muda lagi cute nie...hahahah...yes..this part..he became speechless...i w0n..!

Bila dah hlg kat ingatn dia psal kisah 2...dia akan tnya lagi..."bila budak 2 nak msuk minang? srh msuk cpt2 skit..." ok...he starts again...and i said...jgn risau..lambat lagi...biarlah yg tua dulu.... when this happens...i....ouch...terganggu, dan hilang dah apa yg nak dcakpkan...dem~

whatever it is..it just n0t my time yet...its true mmg rmai kwn2 at my age yg dah tamatkan zaman bujang masing2...tapi haruskah aku f0llow bila aku sendiri sedar diri aku ni yg mmg masih bnyak kekurangan...yelah...sikap aku ni masih n0t matured en0ugh..mmg x matured -p0n..bgun kul 10.30 pagi...klu dah kawen..laki aku keja 0pis..x ke merana mamat 2..ari2 breakfast air liur jer...haha..aku bgun kull 10.30 sbb salun p0n bkak kul 11..klu bkak kul 2..x ke kul 1.30 bru aku bgun...ha, jwb2...

prangai angin aku ni..ada masa ok..ada masa aku ngada2...ape p0n aku x mau buat...klu dah kwen..ada anak...x ke kesian anak 2..ngan bapak2 p0n x leh makan...terbiar jer...even aku mmg teringin nak baby...aku suka baby yg c0mel..klu dapat anak yg x c0mel x ke aku dera bdk 2...haha...kejam..x mungkin...aku mmg leh jadi ibu yg penyayang...tapi bl0m tiba masanya...main ngan anak 0rg lain sdh laa..

ok..sbb yg paling kukuh skali...duit..yes..kerjaya aku p0n x tau mana lagi hala tujunyer...x smpai sbln aku keja ngan mak..s0 aku tahu bisnes ni mmg leh pegi jauh..tapi x tau lagi kuncinye dmana..it takes time..yelah, kawen needs m0ney kan..bkn sbb nak kawen jer..hutang ptptn aku nie..sape nak tlg bayar? bakal laki aku? mampu ke dia tanggung semuanya..? tanggung aku p0n dia mampu ke? klu dia mampu mmg dia anak raja laa..tapi ade ke ank raja nak kat aku...ha, tapi itu p0n aku kena pastikan dia anak raja yg berduit...bkn raja celup...hahaha~

after married, kena la jgk ada simpanan sendiri..pape jadi aku x de la jadi cam 0rg mereng..klu buatnye laki aku tetiba kena langgar l0ri ke ape ke..x ke jadi janda kesian...~

Kesimpulannya, kawen bkn keja senang...mmg nikah 2 bleh buat skali lafaz jer..tapi hidup selepas 2...aku ni mmg jelas dan nyata anak manja..x reti nak buat keja yang c0mplicated..klu nak tau akaun bank aku 2...dah puas k0rek..asal berisi jer..k0rek..cuma tngal duit asb yg brape sen 2 jer..well, my p0int is...i am useless...n0t yet capable of handling other pe0ple life instead of myself...mcm mana nak jaga anak 0rg klu diri sendiri p0n x trjaga...mak aku yg jaga aku...jadi klu nak cari cal0n suami...kenalah yg mampu handle aku dr pelbagai segi..pers0alannya...ade ke?? x kan ada punyalah...sbb 2 kawen 2 masih jauh dr angan...

~ p/s: aku mmg x penah jumpa lelaki yg bt0l nak serius p0n...just kwn f0r fun..ringkasannya..klu ada p0n..dah jumpa pmpn yg lebih muslimah dan keibuaan jadi bininyer...plus lebih lemah lembut...huhu~

need guidance

Something not right happened..i don't know where or what gone's wrong. Just something seems to be so wrong..from the begining..this shouldn't be happened...but i kept telling myself..this is the best thing in my life..that come at the right time and situation. i guess..this is what i want..and won't ever regret this..but now..i don't know...everything went wrong...Ya allah...help me..guide me to protect what i have believed.